Vampire Rain: The Worst Game Ever Made

In my review of resident evil 5, I mentioned that the single worst videogame I’ve ever played was Vampire Rain on the Xbox 360. A few people have asked me about this game, and what was so awful about it. I shall tell you.

When I first saw Vampire Rain I nearly wet myself. Reading it, it looked like splinter cell- with vampires. I love splinter cell. I love vampires. And the lead character was a Welshman. Could this be the very best videogame ever made? Perhaps. I eagerly handed over forty of my hard earned pounds, and practically danced back home before finally loading the game into my 360.

The intro sequence was awesome. The concept was a little b-movie, but still worked. The tutorials where a little fiddly (especially learning how to use the necrovision), but there was nothing to put me off playing the game proper. I began to play the proper game. My first objective? Get to a radio dish (I think it was a TV transmitter or something). Eagerly I began to march through the city, avoiding the very deadly enemies.

An hour and a half later, and I was still tying to get to the f###ing thing. I just couldn’t figure out what the correct route was. I kept running into a Vampire that I could only kill half the time. I. Was. Pissed. Normally when this happens I will start blaming the game developers (Poor level design e.t.c), but in this case I blamed myself first. Surely, the only way to get stuck in a game this early is if you’re a total moron.

I swallowed my pride. I went online to look for a walkthrough. Here’s the clincher, there where NONE. This game is so awful that not one gamer on the face of earth has written a walkthrough for it. After another fifteen minutes fiddling around with a few new ideas I gave up, took out the disk and shelved it with disgust.

The next day I traded it in for a couple of second hand PS2 games, and I was much, much happier.

That hour and a half was the single worst time I have spent as a gamer, and Vampire rain rightly deserves it’s place as the single worst game of the current generation, if not ever.